Numbers

It's been almost 7 months since we left Japan.

It's been one year today since we learned we would be leaving Japan earlier than expected.

 It's been two years today since we first arrived in Japan.

It is hard to explain what that country has done to me...how scared I was to go there....how much I had to grow there....how sad I was to leave...how I think about Japan every day.

Is it the country itself?  The native people there? Or just the friends I had there?  Many of them have left Japan themselves.  I'm not sure.

Does my heart just always yearn to go back instead of forward?  An old friend recently told me they thought I also longed for the place previous to where I was when I had met her, so maybe it is true.  I need to find a place of belonging...and the longing for the past is greater until I do find my "niche" in the new place.   I haven't found my place here yet.